Fitness | Fitness Training Tips

1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then, it hit me.

2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting
a rest.

3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's
all right now.

4. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir
Circumference.

5. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

6. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

7. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

8. A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened
criminal.

9. Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

10. We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

11 When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.

12 The math professor went crazy with the blackboard ... He did a number

on it.

13 The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky
ground.

14 The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

15 If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

16 A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

17 The optometrist fell into his lens grinder and made a spectacle of
himself.
[That's a story that lens itself.]

18 A backward poet writes inverse.

19 A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

20 With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

21 When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

22 The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

23 A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum
Blownapart.

24 You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

25 He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

26 A boiled egg is hard to beat.

27 He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

28 His parents thought he was a budding genius, but he turned out to be
a blooming idiot.

29 A plateau is a high form of flattery.

30 Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

31 When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

32 Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

33 Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

34 Acupuncture: a jab well done.

--
Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
Oscar Wilde

# posted by Scott White @ 11:15 PM